Fishing in the Sand

A man wakes up hours before the crack of dawn. He meanders out into the kitchen with a jovial excitement and begins to prepare for his most anticipated day of the month – his fishing trip. He inspects his tool box to make sure he has all of his bobs and jiggers and hooks. He examines his rod and reel to make sure that none of the eyelets are bent and that his fishing line is not tangled. He looks over his waiters one last time to check for miniscule punctures that would end up in a very bad day and squishy socks… Once all of this preparation is done he grabs the cooler filled with lunch and snacks and drinks, he grabs his sunscreen and other essentials and packs everything in his vehicle. The drive to the marshy habitat in which he will spend his day is about an hour and a half drive, but worth it for the fish and the scenery. Upon arrival he unloads the necessities and treks roughly a mile until his favorite fishing hole is in sight, but he stops short. Just as the sun is beginning to make its first appearance from beyond the horizon his waiters have meet the divide from the grassy habitat into the sandy one, this leads him to the best fishing spot he’s ever had… but instead he sits down and casts off into the sand. 

Now, you’re probably thinking “that’s stupid”. And, quite frankly, it is. Why would someone go through all of that work to stop short of their desired destination, especially when it’s so clearly in sight? 

Good intentions. 

It’s something most of us struggle with from time to time. 

I was listening to a conversation between two really great guys last night, my friend Bobby Hill (Check out his brilliant blog Here) and one of his best friends, we’ll call him Q. They were talking about Strengthfinders and Q’s top strength is ideation – a fascination by ideas and making connections. Bobby threw in off-handedly that ideas were great but sometimes the follow-through was difficult (thus this post was born). 

How often do we have great ideas, but lack the follow through? 

I tend to do this with crafts. I buy the items I need and I get really excited to make something, and then I get busy, or discouraged, or distracted… and the unfinished (sometimes even un-started) product lies in my closet. Out of sight, out of mind. 

I know people who do this with relationships. They start dating a person with the pure intentions of marriage only to end up doing really stupid things that damage their relationship, because they lacked discipline or they got caught up in being selfish. 

You may have good intentions with something when you buy it or even with someone when you start going out, but it all comes down to what you do in the long-run. An idea is just an idea until you put an action to it; an intention is meaningless unless there is follow-through. 

Despite all of the preparations you may have gone through to get to [insert your goal here], discouragement, or busyness, or lack of discipline, or selfishness, or whatever may hinder you has gotten in the way. You’ve stopped short of your desired destination because of [insert your excuse here] and are content to fish in the sand, even though you may be able to see the water. 

Do yourself a favor (I speak to myself here, too) and pick yourself up out of the sand and get to the water. It may take a lot of discipline, or accountability, or encouragement, but you can do it. All of that preparation is not just void because you had a momentary lapse of judgment. Also, do yourself a favor and don’t fish in the sand any more, you’ll look like an idiot.

Introversion - A Theory

Disclaimer: I am not an well versed on this matter, it is merely a matter of opinion and speculation. - If you disagree, which you very well may because this is just a rough idea, please leave your idea(s) below in a comment; I am interested in what you have to say!

With that being said I am going to be blogging about introversion today!

The main source I will be drawing this information from is myself, thus the disclaimer.

Starting with this point: my Myers-Briggs test boldly proclaims that I am 78% introverted (INFJ, by the way).

My Idea: introverts are made, not born.

They are a product of their environment. 

There are naturally exceptions to every rule, but this is the generalization I am making. Pardon me if it's a bit hasty. *Ba-dum-ch* I can't believe I just made a fallacy joke... you don't have to laugh.

Anyways, I only believe this because of my personal experience, and I am welcome to being wrong.

My Theory: I think we can see that everyone has an innate sense of wanting to be accepted and loved. They want to be approved of, and in my experience children, more often than not, go about getting that by vying for your attention. They crave your compliments at crappy macaroni art, and constantly want you to play games with them or be sitting in your lap during a movie... or dinner (which is complicated). They value your opinion, and they want you to know that.

So how does that attention/approval seeking mindset morph into introversion where there is a preference for solitude to regain one's energy?

My Data: when I was a kid I loved to be the center of attention. I wanted the affection of my parents and basically anyone who was around... yes, I was THAT kid. I wanted to be noticed, and I wanted to be with people. But more often than not I found myself alone. Eventually I adapted to this state of being. It wasn't an easy process, but I became creative and found ways to cope with being alone.

I became a pirate in my backyard (I had a metal detector... that's what I wanted for Christmas when I was 8...), or a gymnast, or an archer, or a blacksmith. When my parents took me on a house cleaning job I would become an explorer and find buttons in the carpet and change (which I got to keep and buy myself candy, or s slushi if I had enough). The woods became a carnivorous jungle, and my room became my sanctuary.

I fell in love with books, and eventually writing.

Naturally as an adult I am thankful for those lonely days, because they shaped me into the person that I am.

But looking back, my personality as a young child was very extroverted, and somewhere along the way that was refocused. Instead of gaining my energy from others I preferred to be alone with my books, and people eventually became exhausting. (Don't get me wrong, I love people, and I enjoy spending time with them, but just in smaller groups and for certain amounts of time [pending on the who/how many].)

That's why I started thinking about this. That was a big shift, at least in my life. How did it come about?

My Conclusion: The only honest-to-blog answer I could deduce was that I became a product of my environment. I know that people are not only products of their environments, but also of their actions. However, my actions lead to adapting to my environment of being alone which eventually set the precedence of solitude over social.

Had my environment been different growing up maybe I would have been too, but I don't know nor will I ever.

What do you think?

Are your social precepts and means of regaining vitality set by your environment?

~Amanda Rose

Run

I am not the type of person who enjoys running for fitness... I wish I was, but every time I try I end up getting sick with a terrible headache and decide that it's not worth it. Then I usually end up chugging some chocolate mike with no regret... A week later trying to run again because maybe this time it will be easier. It never is.

Have you ever had that strong feeling in the pit of your stomach to run?

Maybe you like to run to get in shape (more power to you) or, like me, you simply try to be a runner and find it to be an impossible feat. Maybe it was because something scary was going on; maybe you had no reason for fear to rear its ugly head but suddenly all you wanted to do was to make a break for it.

Sometimes I catch myself sitting in the most normal situations and I feel that urge. Like sitting in Starbucks or having a perfectly ordinary conversation and I get that feeling. I never understood it until I took a deeper look at each situation that I was in, and I found two common links to that desire and my surroundings. I get that feeling when I am afraid or overwhelmed.

As someone who has dealt with anxiety disorders in the past it blew my mind that I never made this connection. In the moments before a panic attack that was the feeling I had - I wanted to run, to escape, to be free of whatever was weighing on me or worrying me.

The thought struck me when I was listening to the song Sinnerman by Nina Simon... where was I going to run? Where was I planning to go? Like when I was a kid and ran away... I made it as far as the alleyway two blocks away before I got frightened and realized that as much as I hated my home, it was my shelter and food. 

I feel like we do the same thing with sin in a twisted way. We recognize that it's unsafe, or unhealthy, or just stupid... yet when we get a decent distance from it we remember what was "in it for us", and we don't want to sacrifice our pleasure. Then we go back with our head bowed low, back to our habitual sin, and realize the very same things again... and run down the block. Repeat.

But what if we had somewhere to run? When our own sin overwhelmed us, or when we were just plain frightened about something.... what if we had the set plan to run to the Lord? I know it sounds so blatantly elementary, but I also know that this is not my regular practice, and maybe you can relate. In the face of fear or being entirely overwhelmed, I just get up and take off. No compass can help to direct me because I don't know where I am running, and no map can help me get to where I need to be because I wind up in the strangest of places. I just want distance, not caring about direction. However, upon my bible reading I found a way to have both:

The name of the LORD is a fortified tower; the righteous run to it and are safe (Proverbs 18:10)

Clearly I need to redirect my feet towards the Lord. Not only does this verse say that I have somewhere to run, but that when I get there I'll be safe. That's so much better than the odd places and alleyways I end up in. They offer me a temporary escape, a place to be away from the situation... they cannot offer me safety. The Lord offers me distance and direction from the situations that make me want to run, and I can trust that He will keep me moving past the alleyways. Upon making this a habit it will become my natural response - it will get easier over time. Just like running, but it's up to me (and you) to choose what habits are a part of our lives.

As Alice says in Alice in Wonderland , and I relate with oh so well, "I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it."

Cheers to your journey, and I hope next time you need some distance you get some direction as well!

~Amanda Rose